How NOT to Clean Right Before Your Guests Arrive

If you're like me, then about half an hour before any house guests arrive you frantically run through the living and dining room, sweep any evidence of actually living in your home off of your surfaces, and jam all that crap into the nearest drawer/cabinet/closet to create the appearance of cleanliness. I would literally sweep clutter under a rug, if I could! Unfortunately, it would probably look lumpy under my flat-weave carpets.